mans vs. mild

I bet he climbed out of the shower
pretending he was alone in the house
that it would be ok to quick, wipedown
and then step outside the basin
onto the floormat
out the door
still wiping his balls
dry as he walked down the hallway.

I popped out my door to intercept him as he
walked down my hall, I'm sure he just
wanted her to catch a glimpse of his stump.

I pounced for his throat and leaped on his
soaking body, entirely unconcerned with
touching and getting his
dirty suds on my clothes.

We crashed around the hall,
imprinting the drywall,
he a surprised gazelle, eyes wide,
searching the paintcracked ceiling
for a way out.
I was the furious gator,
hungry for a meal, with the
advantage of surprise,
my hunger intent
on fulfilling my
instincts.

We scrambled, but he was so slippery
was all, he just got on top of me,
and I ended up getting underneath,
stuck below his dripping hairs,
little pine needles
their sticky pine water on my clothes,
his junk on my hoody,
and I was down, the gazelle somehow
mastering its predator, a story unseen
on Planet Earth.

"Just fucking kill me." I grunted.